Cremation and Burial Wishes: What to Put in Your Will and What to Put Elsewhere

Many people want a say in what happens to their body after death: cremation or burial, where ashes are scattered, the kind of service they want, or no service at all. Putting those wishes in writing spares your family hard guesses and can prevent real conflict. The catch is that where you write them matters as much as what you write.

Why your will should not be the only place

A will is a natural place to mention cremation or burial, and Illinois law gives weight to it. But wills are often locked away and not read until days or weeks after death, long after funeral decisions are made. A clause in your will is a good backup. It should not be your whole plan.

The better approach is a short, separate written statement of your wishes, often called a Statement of Interment, Cremation, and Wishes, plus a legal designation of the person who will carry it out. Then mention both in your will.

Who has the legal right to decide

Illinois

The Illinois Disposition of Remains Act sets an order of priority (755 ILCS 65). In general:

1. a person you designate in a written instrument that meets the Act’s requirements
2. your executor, following written instructions in your will
3. your spouse
4. your adult children (a majority if more than one)
5. your parents
6. other relatives, in order of closeness

The written designation must substantially follow the statutory form, be signed by you and your agent, and have your signature notarized. Your written directions can also appear in a will, a prepaid funeral contract, or a qualifying health care power of attorney (755 ILCS 65). The Illinois statutory health care power of attorney form already includes decisions about cremation and burial (755 ILCS 45/4-10).

Missouri

Missouri calls this the right of sepulcher: the right to choose and control burial, cremation, or other final disposition. First priority goes to an attorney in fact named in a durable power of attorney that specifically grants the right of sepulcher. After that it goes to your spouse (unless a divorce is pending), then children, parents, siblings, and other relatives (RSMo 194.119). Missouri also requires that power to be listed expressly in the power of attorney (RSMo 404.710). Our Missouri power of attorney guide explains how that document is signed.

What to include in your statement of wishes

• Burial, cremation, green burial, or body donation
• For cremation: what to do with the ashes, and whether they may be divided or scattered
• For burial: cemetery, plot or mausoleum, casket preferences, and any existing purchases
• Type of service: religious, secular, celebration of life, private, or none
• Readings, music, clothing, or other personal details
• Organ and tissue donation wishes
• Prepaid funeral contracts or burial insurance, with policy numbers
• Who should be in charge, and who should be consulted

Sample will language for cremation and burial

The examples below show the kind of wording often used. They are illustrations only. The right language depends on your state, your other documents, and your family, so have it reviewed before you rely on it.

Cremation: “I direct that my remains be cremated. I request that my ashes be [scattered at ____ / given to ____ / placed at ____]. I have signed a separate written statement of my final wishes, which I ask my family and my executor to follow.”

Burial: “I direct that my remains be buried at [cemetery name and location], in the plot I own [or: next to ____]. I request a [religious / private / graveside] service as described in my separate written statement of final wishes.”

Naming the decision-maker: “I have designated [name] to control the disposition of my remains in a separate signed document. I ask that my executor and family honor that designation.”

Notice that each clause points to a separate document. That is intentional. The separate designation is what gives one person clear legal authority quickly, and the will confirms your intent.

Practical tips

• Tell the person you choose, and give them a copy. A document nobody can find does not help.
• Keep it consistent. Your will, power of attorney, and any prepaid funeral contract should say the same thing.
• Update it after marriage, divorce, or a move to a new state.
• If you own property or have family in both Illinois and Missouri, make sure your documents meet both states’ rules.

Frequently asked questions

Can I put cremation instructions in my will?

Yes, and in Illinois an executor following written instructions in a will has priority over the spouse and children. But a will is often not read until after the funeral, so it should not be the only place your wishes are written.

Who decides between burial and cremation if there is no written plan?

In both Illinois and Missouri, state law sets a priority list. It generally starts with the spouse, then adult children, then parents, then other relatives. In Missouri, an agent named in a durable power of attorney that specifically grants the right of sepulcher comes first.

What is the right of sepulcher in Missouri?

It is the right to choose and control the burial, cremation, or other final disposition of a person’s body. Missouri lets you give that right to a specific person in a durable power of attorney.

Does an Illinois disposition designation need to be notarized?

Yes. Under the Illinois Disposition of Remains Act, a written designation of an agent must be signed by you and your agent, and your signature must be notarized.

This article is general information about Illinois and Missouri law, not legal advice for your situation. Reading it does not create an attorney-client relationship. Attorney advertising.

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